The unspeakable evil

I never ever thought id say this but i have fallen in love again... with a little baby girl by the name of amanda... she is soooooooo cute..... here are some pics

Isnt she just adorable? i cant keep my hands off her... not to mention that she is probably the only baby who would sit on me and not scream her head off... i have to say i felt disturbingly domesticised by the whole event.

** dont you laugh little miss cy and cm. i can hear you choke on your coffee all the way here in burwood east lol**

We had an easter celebration today, we celebrated the end of our little "puasa" (which means easter fast for those of you readers who dont understand malay) by hosting a barbecueue... this was actually a very exciting event in our household because its our very first barbie in Australia!!! yay for us


Mom had afew of her friends over and little Amanda was the centre of attention for me mwahaha .... i never knew i had smothering tendencies until i met this little brat. She is only 5 months old and has a smile that could melt the snowqueen. I spent the entire time juggling eating cleaning up after spills and smothering the little kid with affection and attention. To think she gave up drinking milk to come play with me mwahahaha.

**This is me looking very fatherly**

The downside is that i do realise given my unique circumstances... first of all me liking boys and not being able to concieve a baby for myself lol not naturally possible, second of all i dont think that i could bring myself to adopt a baby and then having to explain why he/she has two daddies.... that would be hard on him/her growing up and me having to be open enough to stand up to the prejudices of being a gay dad. Lets just say i have a very low expectation of humanity excepting gay parents and i wouldnt want my kid to suffer from the choices i made to be gay. Unless humanity realises that any kind of love is good and that its the hate you have to watch out for, i doubt itll happen. Not in my lifetime.

I often do wonder what it would be like to have one of my own... (thus the unspeakable evil)

Until then lol ill stop and admire all the other lovely kids that pass me by.